The Pokemodus is the ultimate modus for Pokemon lovers. Just like pokemon, capturing an item requires a bit of luck.

Let’s just toss this pipe out. It’s not really all that important.

There we go. Now, let’s Capchalogue that GAMEBOX CONTROLLER.

 The larger the item you attempt to capchalogue, the lower the chance you have of actually “catching” the item.

Crap. Oh well.

You may have up to six cards on hand with this custom modus, and through your COMPUTER SAAVY and a fair bit of PROGRAMMING, have created a PC storage system for your Capchalogue cards to save SPACE.

You just make the POKEBALL smaller, and store it in your pocket when you don’t feel like carrying much. You only have enough SPACE for three Capchalogue cards when your POKEBALL is pocket sized.

Good thing you didn’t really need that CONTROLLER!

==>

How about we just spend some time with woah, holy SHIT dude! Where the fuck did you get that?!

Not telling? Sounds like a gift from your BRO, then. How about we just… shuffle around in your room, take a gander outside, fuck around with your Sylladex. That sort of thing. Anything that isn’t brandishing that thing around.

That is basically an impossibility! Oh well! The least you could do now is check your STRIFE SPECIBUS! 

Your specibus of choice is SCEPTERKIND, fitting for one of your ENTHUSIASM and ROYAL BEARING. You enjoy bludgeoning foes into submission with it.

Or you would, if you had any real foes to bludgeon.

Now that this has been taken care of, narrative should really switch to a more GENTLEMANLY angle.

Well, that was short-lived! Let’s do something else while we focus on you.

You’re quite fond of your CONDITIONAL MODUS. You initally picked this card because of the large, red exclaimation point adorning the back of each empty card. You can access any object within it at any time, as long as you meet certain conditons as asked of you by the card.

You capchalogue SPIKE, putting him away for future use. Now, that all your cards are filled, let’s see what we can take out.

Hmm… Well, what you take out depends on the condition written on the back of each card. Let’s try out your SONIC SCREWDRIVER REPLICA’s condition, first:

Poop on your desk and writhe like a flagella.

Oh. Oh, my.  How about we keep that in there. What about this REGAL CROWN? It must have a much more innocuous condition:

Take off all your clothes and streak through the nearest supermarket.

What? But there aren’t even any supermarkets around here to do so in. This is an island! Oh dear. This doesn’t look good at all. The glowsticks?

Make a funny face.

Oh, hell yes. You are both the crown monarch and prime-fucking-minister of silly faces. You command an entire army of silly faces, riding on the back of a silly horse and gunning down foes with a silly rifle. That silly.

Just look at that! You are a complete badass.

The glowsticks are ejected from your sylladex.

STEF: Hi, Rocko!

Stef: Bye, Rocko!

==> Stef: Calm down and take a look outside.

Oh, yes! You lean out of your window to scope out today’s scenery.

The view here on HEX ISLAND is always incredibly calming, what with the pinkening sky as sunset nears and idyllic, rolling hills. Not the most interesting scenery, but you find it incrdibly relaxing to paint the sky and full, fluffy clouds when you feel the need to relax a bit. There isn’t much to do since you’ve explored the entire island on your own, save for the FROG RELIC because ROCKO always teleports you away.

Speaking of ROCKO, just where could the MARSUPIAL that has raised you since you were a toddler be?

absinthePrincess [AP] began pestering chivalDisobedience [CD] at ??:??

AP: Kirk! Kirk! Kiiiiiiirk!

AP: Kirky-Kirk-Kirkenheimer!

CD: Stefanie my friend please calm down

AP: Oh, but I am calm! And, my name isn’t even Stefanie!!!! u>u

CD: Calm people don’t use four exclaimation points Stef

CD: Take a deep breath and calm down

AP: Fine, I’ll try and calm down! But, eeeeee! I’m so excited!!!!!! >u<

CD: You are doing literally the exact opposite of chilling

AP: See, this is me chilling!

AP: I am chilling the fuck out!

AP: The fuck has been chilled right out of me!

AP: ICE COLD!!!!!!!

CD: *Raises eyebrows*

CD: I’m not quite sure what that means but Im glad youre calm if this is you being calm

AP: This is basically as calm as I am going to get in this situation!

CD: Right then

CD: Was there something you needed to talk about

AP: Yes!!!!!

AP: The game we’ll be playing! Have you recieved your copies!

CD: I have my copies yes

CD: Wait

CD: Was that a question

AP: Yes, but neither of us use question marks!

CD: Thats actually really confusing

CD: Cant you use an interrobang since your punctuation keys arent all broken like mine

AP: An interrowhat!!! o>o

CD: I’ll copy and paste one for you 

CD: ‽

AP: Sweet baby jesus on a SANDWICH!!!!! O>O

CD: Can you never say that combination of words again

AP: Oh, alright! But THAT is one badass peice of punctuation!!!!!!!!

AP: But I don’t think I’ll be using it unless the situation really calls for it!

CD: Why

CD: You use exclaimation points even when the situation doesn’t call for it

AP: Yes, but that’s my quirk! Everyone has a quirk, like you with your constant lack of punctuation!

CD: This is not a quirk

CD: This is a lifetime of broken keyboards

AP: Riiiiiight!!! u c u

CD: Seriously

CD: Ive never bought a keyboard with punctuation keys that actually worked other than the asterisk

CD: Is my lack of puctuation really so important

AP: Yes!!!!

AP: Hehe, I bet all my excess punctuation makes you jealous!!!

CD: Not particularly

CD: Jealousy is so uneligant

AP: Inelegant.

CD: Unelegant

CD: We have this discussion daily Stef you *know* youre wrong

AP: Whateverrrrrrrrrrr dude! e>e

AP: It’s not a word!!!!!!

AP: Anywaaaaaays, be ready to play when Kree and Viola get on!!!!!!!!

CD: I should be ready

AP: Okay! Ciaaaaaaao!!! uwu

CD: Wait

absinthePrincess [AP] ceased pestering chivalDisobedience [CD] at ??:??

CD: Are you really sure we should be playing this game

CD: I mean

CD: From what youve said about it it sounds pretty dangerous

Oh, what’s that? It seems one of your good chums is pestering you, and she seems rather excited! Erm… Not that there’s ever a time when she doesn’t sound excited.

==> Kirk: Answer chum.

The scope of narration fixes it’s eye on a second teenager this evening. Whoever could this DAPPER GENT be?

==> Be the WOMANIZING CAD.

What? No! That’s such a terrible, inelegant nickname. Your name is KIRK KELSO and you believe, without a doubt, that ZOMBIES are the coolest thing ever.

You pride yourself on upholding CHIVALRY as best you can under given circumstances, and are the unparallelled authority on ACTION MOVIES and WEBCOMICS, as well as VIDEO GAMES. You consider yourself quite the GENTLEMAN, which is why you collect FANCY PIPES and DAPPER HATS and think BOWTIES are cool. These things couble possibly the reason why you garner so much attention from the ladies. These aforementioned LADIES being your three best friends. Ah! How could you have forgotten? Today is the day you’ll be playing a game one of your friends has been a ROYAL PAIN IN THE ASS about goading you into playing.

Your chumhandle is chivalDisobediance and you find yourself rather uninclined to using punctuation

Your name is STEF DORIAN, and you’re a bit too old for placronym gaffes or arm related antics. Please. Your sense of humor is far more mature than that. Only the highest caliber dick jokes, for you!

At current you are standing poised and dignified near your door, trying to contain just how antsy you really are at this moment. You are in posession of a copy of SBURB BETA, without any CONVULUTED MACHINATIONS UNRELATED TO THE PLOT cluttering your narrative scope so you can GET THIS SHOW ON THE ROAD.

But most importantly, you are waiting anxiously for your best friends to log onto Pesterchum. All three of them are given to being incredibly elusive. Today is the day you will play this game, an amazing game you are sternly convinced will change not only the face of the planet, but set the universe itself right. According to your hackneyed research, anyways. Among your interests are HISTORY, and the entire genre of SCIENCE FICTION in every iteration. You also have a thing for METAL VIXENS and STEELY SEXBOTS, but above all is your admiration of PRINCESSES.You OBSESSIVELY collect ROYAL REGALIA for this reason, and much of your research into HISTORY deals with MONARCHIES. You’re a little too old for starry-eyed dreams of PRINCES coming to save you from the TOWER you may or may not currently be living in at SEVENTEEN, but a girl can dream, can she not? She can dream of TIARAs and TEA PARTIES, SCEPTERS and SPACE FLEETS.

Near your bed lies SPIKE, a precious present from a PROMISCUOUS PALHONCHO. Feeling especially cuddly all of a sudden, you seek to allocate SPIKE to your CONDITIONAL MODUS. You set your lively gaze upon SPIKE’s lusterless eyes. Sparks dance between your held gazes. You move over and stroke his lucious lavender coat and coral pink mane as you do daily, always sure to polish his plush horn.

He is your everything.

Your chumhandle is absinthePrincess, and you spend a considerable amount of TIME sounding enthused (!!! >w<), but can never quite seem to ask the right questions! But your narrative can wait! Another chum beckons the attentions of narrative scope!!!

A young woman stands poised in her room, on the precipice of adventure. Today is of no particular importance — much like many other days in her eighteen years of life. She and her friends have all grown disenchanted of their world, the monotony of everyday life and the complacency of other people. This is a good thing, as she and three other youths stand on the brink of the reckoning. Hey, just what will we call this young woman?

Three unstable young women, an unwilling male counterpart and an unlikely creation myth of epic proportions.